Plenty o'sleep is recommended if you plan on attending one of Dickie's infamous booze parties. Hey bies, it's your buddy Dickie Dumfry here again!

Word was that the big-wigs down at the CCK's Central Campus wanted someone who knew Newfoundland like the back of their hand to write this section, so guess who volunteered to do it! Well, yeah, you know generous ole' Dickie, he'd do anything for someone in need (or is that "someone in heat"). That, and the fact that ole' Dickie here knows that when you scratch the bosses' backs, they scratch yours, if you know what I mean!

But yeah, back to the Newfie Campus. I gotta say, if you're looking to take a course in Village Idiocy (my personal favorite), the Rock is far and away the best damned location you'll ever get. Cripes, all those Newfie jokes gotta come from somewhere! If I'm not mistaken, I think the average I.Q. rate in this province is something like 40 points lower than the national average -- and with your help we'll strive to get it lower still!

But don't get thinkin' that we only teach the one course over here -- jeez bie, I think there's a grand total of something like 45 of 'em (but I'll be damned if I could name more than about a dozen). I guess, from the ones I know of, the most noteworthy of the bunch would have to be Village Idocy (you knew that was coming), Stamp Licking, Legoland Engineering, and Professional Bullshitting. But then again, ole' Dickie's a pretty strange fellow, so the courses I just mentioned might just be something I conjured up in a drunken fantasy -- that's for you to find out!

Dickie Dumfry, signing off. Blow-Me-Down, Newfoundland