Bonjour, mes amis! Comment sa va? Ah, tres bien, tres bien. OK, now that we've gotten the mandatory Francais introduction over with for those crazy Queerbekkers, let's get down to business. The CCK Training Center in downtown Saint-Louis-du-Ha! Ha! is conveniently located less than 50km away from the US border. This lends to support the primary course of study here, the "Illegal" Cigarette Trade. (Please don't be scared off by the word "illegal." We here in the CCK family tend to think of the word "illegal" as nothing more than a technical law abiding way of saying "Good.") And a good Cigarette Trade it is, anually generating millions of dollars for the local community and surrounding area's economies. Did we mention that the Training Center in Saint-Louis-du-Ha! Ha! is also in God's Country, a.k.a Hell's Angel's Territory. As a matter of fact there is a drug joint/whore house directly across the street from the property the CCK purchased for the Training Center. We know what you're thinking, but you won't lose any sleep over this situation (we told you so!). Anywhoo, there be no need to worry. We have the Hell's Angels in our back pocket (or is that us in their back pocket?) And to boot, there hasn't been a bomb threat reported in the past 10 days! Besides, the CCK School Policy clearly defines nuclear weapons and other explosive devices as outdoor toys. You'll be able sleep through an earthquake before you should wake due to an accidental detonation! After all that's been said though (and believe us when we say we know how tempting the offer is!) it must be stressed that the Cresco College of Kurtivity absolves itself from any negligent behavior resulting in defamation of character, apprehension by the authorities, injury, or death. Should any legal action take place, the CCK will vehemently deny in court that any such acts occured, and upon aquital of the defendant a full scale investigation will be launched as to how a rat bastard like the plaintiff got into the CCK system. Amen for crooked judicial officials. Amen indeed!