Well, now that the epidemic is in full swing, Boo Boo doesn't really have time to submit a bio of himself, but as soon as things calm down a little I'm sure me and him can get something put together for this page. In the meantime, the CCK Medical staff is proud to present to you a new feature here on Boo Boo's page- a never before seen "Dear Boo Boo" document highlighting the curiosity and self-awareness Boo Boo was able to generate through his love of both himself and his simian friends. Unfortunately, we were unable to get our hands on Boo Boo's replies to these questions, comments, and inquires. There be no need to fret though. You'll have such an understanding of what Boo Boo means not only to us at the CCK but to everyone in this dog-eat-dog world, you won't want to see them! -- Prof. Lionel K. Humphrey, Head of Linguisticks Dept. Dear Boo Boo: My monkey, Allan, has a bad case of rectal cysts. What do you suggest as treatment? Rick Ganges, New Delhi, India Dear Boo Boo: I want to lick you. Eric Springfield, Dorchester Penitentary, New Brunswick Dear Boo Boo: Can Monkeys contract genital herpes? Rhonda Whalen, Sacramento, California Dear Boo Boo: Can I feed my monkey bran? I heard it promotes regularity. Steven Horice, Regina, Sasketchewan Dear Boo Boo: Is it true they eat monkeys in Asia? Little Mark Spence, Chicago, Illinois Dear Boo Boo: What's the going rate for monkeys testicles? Yolanda Glenn, Providence, Rhode Island Dear Boo Boo: Why do monkeys scratch themselves all the time? Tracy Hutchison, Chicago, Illinois Dear Boo Boo: Is killing a monkey with your bare hands as fun as I think it is? Shawn Morrison, Port Hawksebury, Nova Scotia Dear Boo Boo: Is having a monkey as a pet really like a "Barrel of Monkeys?" Little Joanie Toast, Pickering, Ontario Dear Boo Boo: Do monkeys use toilets and urinals or will a pile of old newspapers in the corner do just as good a job? David C. Heisman, Victoria, British Columbia Dear Boo Boo: My monkey Timothy is dying a horrible death from a rare form of stomach cancer, what do you suggest? Tina Currie, Googles, Newfoundland Dear Boo Boo: My neighbor's chimp Damon has really bad head lice. It's really bad! Can I just, like, uh..put him in a potato sack or something, and like, umm...throw him in the harbour? It's really bad!!!! Little Jeff Smith, Stratford, Ontario Dear Boo Boo: I heard that the CCK imports dried out monkey scrotums from the amazon and uses them in it's Petroleum Jelly. They claim that's what makes it so jelly like. What do you have to say? Little Jason Deacon, Ingonish, Nova Scotia